I think its sad to see people sit on the sidelines of their life - just watching it pass by until its too late to do anything. Accepting less than they deserve - being treated poorly by their loved ones - not taking risks and accepting defeat. Thinking that the every day struggle is normal and that they will never have anything better in their life. That some how they deserve this fate. It breaks my heart.
People in jobs that they hate - getting up every morning dreading the day - trading time for money - spending most of their waking hours with people they either dont really like or people who also dont want to be there which makes for a very negative environment. Counting down to the weekend and cramming everything they possibly can before Monday morning comes around again. People who work so hard and stretch themselves so thin that they become stressed and sick because they believe that this is what they have to do help their families. I know all to well that a lifetime is not guaranteed and that your life can end in an instant. But when offered a gift to change this, they simply say they arent interested for fear they cant do it, or the assumption of what it is they are being offered, or the fear of what others will think of them. WHO CARES what others think!! We were not put on this earth to struggle but so many people accept that this is their fate and make no steps to change it.
People in toxic marriages. Now i dont mean marriages where there is just regular fighting and tough days because lets face it, everyone goes thru that. Im talking about loveless, abusive, controlling marriages where one partner is being abused. It doesnt have to be physically, mentally is just as bad, if not worse, in my mind. I have been in a mentally abusive relationship and its harder to see the damage that is being done to someone who is watching from the outside. I have friends who are in relationships like this and it breaks my heart to know they either feel like this is normal and acceptable or worse, believe the things they are being told. To be controlled by someone that says they love you is not love, its simply that.... Control. To watch someone you love have their sparkle dim because they finally start believing the lies they are told day in and day out. Heart breaking, dont you think?
I am currently in a mastermind group and we are reading the book, Think and Grow Rich and after only getting thru the first 3 chapters, there are some powerful quotes i would like to share that really resonated with me.
1 - Success comes to those who become success conscious. Failure comes to those who indifferently allow themselves to become failure conscious.
2 - If you do not see great riches in your imagination, you will never see them in your bank balance.
3 - If the thing you wish to do is right, and you believe in it, go ahead and do it! Put your dream across, and never mind what "they" say if you meet with temporary defeat, for "they", perhaps do not know that every failure brings with it the seed of an equivalent success.
4 - A BURNING DESIRE to be and to do is the starting point from which the dreamer must take off. Dreams are not born of indifference, laziness or lack of ambition.
5 - Our only limitations are the those we set up in our own minds!
6 - It is a well known fact that one comes, finally, to BELIEVE whatever one repeats to ones self, whether the statement be true of false.
Stop being scared to take a risk, to step out of your comfort zone, to do what you love instead of spend your days doing what you dont love. Believe you are worthy and deserving of everything your heart desires and then go do whatever you need to do to make that happen. Dont listen to people that tell you that you cant. There is something in them that wants to keep you down so that they feel better about themselves. Go do everything you have ever wanted and dreamed of and dont let anyone tell you otherwise. It is so sad to see so many simply settle for what is and never believe that they could have more. It is not selfish to want more in your life.
If you didnt ever have to worry about money..... what would you be doing, where would you be doing it and who would you be doing it with? I guarantee you that you would not say " i would be at work"! Go get all that you deserve in this life!!! I believe in you, now believe in yourself!!! <3
Wednesday, 2 December 2015
Tuesday, 6 October 2015
You are in Charge of your Own Story
Have you ever wondered why things never go your way? Why you never have enough money or that you always have bad luck? Think for a minute about the words that you use throughout the day... Are you concentrating on everything you dont have or dont want, or are you thinking about the things you do have or desire?
So many people are talking more about what they dont want than what they do want. When was it ok for us, as adults to stop dreaming? As children, we had such a vivid imagination and dreamed big! We would dream about the car we wanted to have, what it looked like, what color it was going to be and so on. Maybe a little girl would imagine her fairy tale wedding right down to the last detail and any adult would say, you can have whatever you put your mind to.... But as we become adults and we share the same dreams with other adults, you get comments like "oh, good luck with that", "keep dreaming", or "that will never happen"... why is it that people think its ok to crush other peoples dreams simply because those dream crushers don't know how to dream anymore? Would you say that to a child?
I just got home from my company conference in Las Vegas and I walked away from that with lots of notes and some AHA moments and i would like to share some of those here. Not only will this be helpful for our team, but i can only hope that something will connect with YOU out there too and perhaps encourage you to reach for your dreams too! Dont let anyone tell you that you cant achieve your dreams, because you absolutely can!
Every single Diamond who gave their speech this past weekend said the exact same thing when they started - they didn't have belief in themselves, in that they could not do this business, they were too shy, too busy, too this and to that. Those are all excuses to not step out of your comfort zone. The #1 reason why people arent open to hearing about other opportunities is because they are afraid that they cant do it, that they will fail but its simply not true. Anyone can do anything if they just believe.
If you don't open your dream box, no one else will open it for you. No one in the world is better than you are. You are special and unique. Never compare yourself with anyone else. Find the reason why you are here.
We have the key to happiness and we can change someones life forever with this gift. If you don't find the reason why you are here, you wont be able to move forward.
Ask yourself - What do you want to achieve in your life? What are you willing to sacrifice to do that? What are you going to do? If you knew you could NOT fail, would you do it?
In a perfect world, what would your life look like? If money wasn't an issue, If you could do anything, with anyone, anywhere in the world, what would you be doing? I can guarantee you wouldn't say you would be at work.
Think about your life right now in this moment and then think about, if you did absolutely nothing to change your life financially, what would your life look like in 5 years? Most likely the same or worse.... so why aren't you open to simply hearing about something that could help you change your entire life for the better? because you are scared of failure or success. But those are just fears. Be open to change.
In the face of adversity, do you get bitter or better?
When you point at others and blame them for your lack of success, you actually have 3 more fingers pointing at you. Life isn't easy but you have to know what you want. Are you trying or are you doing?
How can you have a dream come true if you dont have a dream? Stop shoulding on yourself and stop shoulding on others. What tiny thing are you willing to do or change to reach your dreams? Your mind doesnt know the difference between the truth and a lie - it only believes what you tell it. Think about that for a second and then pay attention to the thoughts you are thinking about yourself.
If there is a problem in your life or in your business, take a good look in the mirror.
After this weekend, i realized something that is stalling my own business and that is belief in myself and of what I think people think about me. Because of my struggles with my weight, i fear standing up in front of others and presenting, being the center of attention, walking that stage as a diamond, because then i am vulnerable, they will pick me apart, notice all my flaws and its just easier to sit in the background so that doesn't happen. Of course, i know all of this is in my head and my own fears and insecurities but i know that its definetly hindering my personal business - there for i have made a goal for myself to lose 25 lbs before our next conference in San Diego at the end of February and I WILL be walking that stage! For what rank, you ask? You will just have to wait and see. So here I am, shouting it out here to make myself accountable to whoever is reading this. I am done feeling insecure and embarrassed - feeling like im not worthy of success because of what i look like. A good friend said to me on Sunday, "I dont see what you see about yourself. I see an amazing leader who cares about others"... so my goal is to see that about myself.
As TL once told me, say this over and over again and write it down - I AM DIAMOND IMMEDIATELY OR SOONER!
What is your dream? I would love to hear all of your dreams and help you be accountable to those dreams. We are ALL IN this together!! Lets go make shit happen!!
So many people are talking more about what they dont want than what they do want. When was it ok for us, as adults to stop dreaming? As children, we had such a vivid imagination and dreamed big! We would dream about the car we wanted to have, what it looked like, what color it was going to be and so on. Maybe a little girl would imagine her fairy tale wedding right down to the last detail and any adult would say, you can have whatever you put your mind to.... But as we become adults and we share the same dreams with other adults, you get comments like "oh, good luck with that", "keep dreaming", or "that will never happen"... why is it that people think its ok to crush other peoples dreams simply because those dream crushers don't know how to dream anymore? Would you say that to a child?
I just got home from my company conference in Las Vegas and I walked away from that with lots of notes and some AHA moments and i would like to share some of those here. Not only will this be helpful for our team, but i can only hope that something will connect with YOU out there too and perhaps encourage you to reach for your dreams too! Dont let anyone tell you that you cant achieve your dreams, because you absolutely can!
Every single Diamond who gave their speech this past weekend said the exact same thing when they started - they didn't have belief in themselves, in that they could not do this business, they were too shy, too busy, too this and to that. Those are all excuses to not step out of your comfort zone. The #1 reason why people arent open to hearing about other opportunities is because they are afraid that they cant do it, that they will fail but its simply not true. Anyone can do anything if they just believe.
If you don't open your dream box, no one else will open it for you. No one in the world is better than you are. You are special and unique. Never compare yourself with anyone else. Find the reason why you are here.
We have the key to happiness and we can change someones life forever with this gift. If you don't find the reason why you are here, you wont be able to move forward.
Ask yourself - What do you want to achieve in your life? What are you willing to sacrifice to do that? What are you going to do? If you knew you could NOT fail, would you do it?
In a perfect world, what would your life look like? If money wasn't an issue, If you could do anything, with anyone, anywhere in the world, what would you be doing? I can guarantee you wouldn't say you would be at work.
Think about your life right now in this moment and then think about, if you did absolutely nothing to change your life financially, what would your life look like in 5 years? Most likely the same or worse.... so why aren't you open to simply hearing about something that could help you change your entire life for the better? because you are scared of failure or success. But those are just fears. Be open to change.
In the face of adversity, do you get bitter or better?
When you point at others and blame them for your lack of success, you actually have 3 more fingers pointing at you. Life isn't easy but you have to know what you want. Are you trying or are you doing?How can you have a dream come true if you dont have a dream? Stop shoulding on yourself and stop shoulding on others. What tiny thing are you willing to do or change to reach your dreams? Your mind doesnt know the difference between the truth and a lie - it only believes what you tell it. Think about that for a second and then pay attention to the thoughts you are thinking about yourself.
If there is a problem in your life or in your business, take a good look in the mirror.
After this weekend, i realized something that is stalling my own business and that is belief in myself and of what I think people think about me. Because of my struggles with my weight, i fear standing up in front of others and presenting, being the center of attention, walking that stage as a diamond, because then i am vulnerable, they will pick me apart, notice all my flaws and its just easier to sit in the background so that doesn't happen. Of course, i know all of this is in my head and my own fears and insecurities but i know that its definetly hindering my personal business - there for i have made a goal for myself to lose 25 lbs before our next conference in San Diego at the end of February and I WILL be walking that stage! For what rank, you ask? You will just have to wait and see. So here I am, shouting it out here to make myself accountable to whoever is reading this. I am done feeling insecure and embarrassed - feeling like im not worthy of success because of what i look like. A good friend said to me on Sunday, "I dont see what you see about yourself. I see an amazing leader who cares about others"... so my goal is to see that about myself.
As TL once told me, say this over and over again and write it down - I AM DIAMOND IMMEDIATELY OR SOONER!
What is your dream? I would love to hear all of your dreams and help you be accountable to those dreams. We are ALL IN this together!! Lets go make shit happen!!
Wednesday, 16 September 2015
25 Things About Me That You May Not Know
I have neglected my blog this year and so i thought i would do a light hearted post with some things that you may not know about me. I have so many thoughts and things that i want to write about, but when i put pen to paper (or fingertip to keys) i either lose the thoughts i want to convey or i worry about if what i am writing will offend, annoy or hurt someone. I know I shouldnt worry about that because these thoughts are MINE but as a people pleaser by nature, its always in the back of my mind. So today I will keep it somewhat light and share some things about myself that you may or may not know about me. Enjoy.... or dont..... its ok either way. :)
1 - I am seriously addicted to hand cream, brushing my teeth and journals/notebooks of any kind. Seriously! I dont even know how many journals i have and they are all for different things - i cant write in just one about everything.
2 - I'm pretty sure i have a case of mild OCD.
3 - I am often sarcastic which can sometimes cause problems when people don't have a sense of humor.
4 - I struggle with hormone issues and food intolerance's which make it very hard to lose weight which in turn makes me feel very insecure and self conscious about my appearance.
5 - In high school, i was very shy and insecure.
6 - I am still shy and sometimes insecure - and it can often come across that i am snobby or bitchy - but its not. I am most likely having anxiety if there are lots of people or i just dont know what to say. Im also not good with small talk.
7 - I could sit on the beach all day every day.... If you dont know this about me then you must be living under a rock. haha
8 - I love to take pictures and i am pretty sure I have at least one picture of everyone i have ever met.
9 - If i had never met Brent, i would definetly be married to Adam Levine.... What? It could totally happen. Stop laughing.
10 - I can tell if anything has been moved in my house - even an inch. Its annoying... and why i think I have mild OCD.
11 - I don't like loud noises of any kind. If you ever read the book, The Highly Sensitive Person, you would totally get it
12 - I don't like being hot....... bury me with an air conditioner! I have a fan blowing in my room all year, even in the winter.
13 - Pretty sure i lived somewhere tropical in another life. I feel at peace when im surrounded by blue water, palm trees and sunshine. Its like therapy for me.
14 - I love doing laundry - its kind of like shopping... New things every few days to put into your closet.
15 - Speaking of shopping, i love to shop! Well mostly just for clothes! Clothes make me feel good about myself and help with my self esteem.
16 - When I was 32 years old, my first husband passed away due do complications from a heart bacteria, which ended up causing a stroke due to Dr error. Yes, there was a lawsuit.... that is a whole other blog post.
17 - I had a second child at 39 years old - my Dr called it a geriatric pregnancy because of my age. Lovely!
18 - Being pregnant is my very least favorite thing to do... ever... Yes the outcome is a miracle when you hold your baby in your arms but the 9 months leading up to it is pure torture.....I dont trust happy, pregnant people. haha
19 - Both of my husbands I met at a bar - not the same bar - and of course 9 years apart - but at the bar,none the less
20 - I met my husband and soul mate, Brent, on July 19, 2003 - my wedding anniversary with my first husband, Rene - a year after he had passed away. Coincidence? I don't think so.
21 - I want to walk the Camino Santiago with Brent one day. I think it would be great therapy and an amazing adventure.
22 - Speaking of therapy - i highly recommend it. I think everyone could use a good cry once in awhile and to get the shit out that they have been holding inside for so long.
23 - I enjoy a good reality tv show once in awhile. Dont judge - i bet you do too.
24 - I want to write a book - cant decide if it will be fiction or non fiction but one of my dreams is to write one. - stay tuned
25 - La Casa resort is my happy place!! I plan to have a cottage there one day where my family can come to stay and relax.
1 - I am seriously addicted to hand cream, brushing my teeth and journals/notebooks of any kind. Seriously! I dont even know how many journals i have and they are all for different things - i cant write in just one about everything.
2 - I'm pretty sure i have a case of mild OCD.
3 - I am often sarcastic which can sometimes cause problems when people don't have a sense of humor.
4 - I struggle with hormone issues and food intolerance's which make it very hard to lose weight which in turn makes me feel very insecure and self conscious about my appearance.
5 - In high school, i was very shy and insecure.
6 - I am still shy and sometimes insecure - and it can often come across that i am snobby or bitchy - but its not. I am most likely having anxiety if there are lots of people or i just dont know what to say. Im also not good with small talk.
7 - I could sit on the beach all day every day.... If you dont know this about me then you must be living under a rock. haha
8 - I love to take pictures and i am pretty sure I have at least one picture of everyone i have ever met.
9 - If i had never met Brent, i would definetly be married to Adam Levine.... What? It could totally happen. Stop laughing.
10 - I can tell if anything has been moved in my house - even an inch. Its annoying... and why i think I have mild OCD.
11 - I don't like loud noises of any kind. If you ever read the book, The Highly Sensitive Person, you would totally get it
12 - I don't like being hot....... bury me with an air conditioner! I have a fan blowing in my room all year, even in the winter.
13 - Pretty sure i lived somewhere tropical in another life. I feel at peace when im surrounded by blue water, palm trees and sunshine. Its like therapy for me.
14 - I love doing laundry - its kind of like shopping... New things every few days to put into your closet.
15 - Speaking of shopping, i love to shop! Well mostly just for clothes! Clothes make me feel good about myself and help with my self esteem.
16 - When I was 32 years old, my first husband passed away due do complications from a heart bacteria, which ended up causing a stroke due to Dr error. Yes, there was a lawsuit.... that is a whole other blog post.17 - I had a second child at 39 years old - my Dr called it a geriatric pregnancy because of my age. Lovely!
18 - Being pregnant is my very least favorite thing to do... ever... Yes the outcome is a miracle when you hold your baby in your arms but the 9 months leading up to it is pure torture.....I dont trust happy, pregnant people. haha
19 - Both of my husbands I met at a bar - not the same bar - and of course 9 years apart - but at the bar,none the less
20 - I met my husband and soul mate, Brent, on July 19, 2003 - my wedding anniversary with my first husband, Rene - a year after he had passed away. Coincidence? I don't think so.
21 - I want to walk the Camino Santiago with Brent one day. I think it would be great therapy and an amazing adventure.
22 - Speaking of therapy - i highly recommend it. I think everyone could use a good cry once in awhile and to get the shit out that they have been holding inside for so long.
23 - I enjoy a good reality tv show once in awhile. Dont judge - i bet you do too.
24 - I want to write a book - cant decide if it will be fiction or non fiction but one of my dreams is to write one. - stay tuned
25 - La Casa resort is my happy place!! I plan to have a cottage there one day where my family can come to stay and relax.Saturday, 7 February 2015
A Giant Leap Outside My Comfort Zone
Wow, time sure does fly by. Today, February 7, 2015 marks our 2 year anniversary with Nucerity International. Hard to believe its been that long already, considering it seems like yesterday when our good friend, Tamara, sat in our living room, bursting with excitement, sharing this opportunity with us, while I just sat there and thought to myself....."great, she is trying to get us into one of those "things", and i really like her but now I am going to have to avoid her because this is the last thing that I want to do."....Boy, am I glad I took the time to be open minded and listen, even though I was super skeptical.
Why did we decide to join Tamara that day? The fact that she was super excited and bursting at the seams about this opportunity really got me thinking, and it made us excited too, even though we really didnt know much about it yet, and neither did she as she had just started too. She also said that there was no pressure to join her and that she was running with it regardless of our decision.... That was what got me.... I didnt want to be left behind! So even though we didnt really know much yet, we jumped in with 2 feet because we knew if she was excited, there was a reason.
Looking back now after 2 years, I really realize the gift that Tamara gave to us. If we had continued to be closed minded and not taken the time simply to listen, our life would look alot different. At the time I had been off work (by choice) for 2.5 years but was having to start to look for work as it was getting tougher to keep up with the bills on only one income as well as running our fitness business. The thought of going back to work after not working for that long, scared the hell out of me. Not to mention it was not something I had any desire to do. Not because i am lazy, because that is not the case. Its because after being home for so long, being able to make my own schedule, being able to attend my daughters school functions and be home for her when she was done school at the end of the day, being able to plan holidays without worrying about if I could have the time off, etc, was something that I enjoyed and was grateful for. Going back to work 40 hours a week would take all that away from me and I would be at the mercy of my boss and having to ask for family time when needed. If i had of not been open minded, I would be doing just that right now.... working a J.O.B and trying to fit in quality family time in on the weekends. Not to mention in this economy, your job isnt even secure anymore like it used to be. Companies are closing down every where we look and who knows what company will be next. If I lost my job, I wouldn't have a 2nd stream of income to fall back on. I would have nothing and that would definitely cause a lot of stress. I also wouldn't have been able to raise our son.... he would have grew up in daycare while I was working to pay for that daycare. Now don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with daycare. My daughter went to daycare since she was 6 months old, however, her daycare teachers got to raise her for the most part while I was at work. That wasnt something we wanted for our son.
Also, at a job, you dont get paid for your efforts. You get told your worth by how much you make an hour. Usually, no matter how hard you work, your pay cheque every 2 weeks is the same. You are trading time for money. I didn't want to do that anymore. We work just hard enough so we dont get fired, and our employer pays us just enough so that we don't quit. I also saw how hard my parents worked their entire lives and for what...... so they could retire with 40% of their income? We didnt want that for ourselves. And my Dad didnt even make it to retirement.... he passed away before he could even enjoy any money from his efforts! Because of losing my first husband when I was only 31, i knew that you arent guaranteed to even be around when its time to retire so then what? All that hard work and your gone. You cant enjoy it with your family and friends because you are no longer here.
Today, 2 years later, i havent had to go back to a day job. I work 12-14 hours a week which is full time in Nucerity. I choose when I want to work those 12-14 hours, not a boss. And I get paid for my efforts. If I do nothing, I dont get paid. Its as simple as that. This isnt a get rich quick scheme, its work, just like your job is work. You have to work at it. If you stopped going to work, would you get paid? Nope..... Network marketing is no different. People join thinking its a lottery ticket but its not. Its work! That is why it is called NetWORKing..... they join, talk to a few people, get some no's and quit saying its not for them..... This is a Million $ business and we treat it as such. Its a 2-5 year plan. Heck.... if you could be a millionaire in 2-5 years, wouldnt you want to give it an honest go? Those 2-5 years are going to pass by anyways so why not do something on the side, that you can schedule in when its convenient for you and who knows..... You could fire your boss one day. I know many women and men in this company that have done just that in less than 5 years! We want that for us too and we WILL have it, whether you join us or not.
Now you are probably thinking...... well, I could never do that..... but your wrong. You could! If you believe you can, you can. If you have a burning desire for something more, you will find a way. My burning desire was simply that....... I dont want to work all my life, wishing I could take my family on a vacation, or to grow old with regrets because i worked my whole life trying to earn enough money one day to retire and be with my family. I dont want to stress every month worrying about how I am going to pay the bills and only buying the necessities for groceries because I cant afford to buy the extras.... I wanted more... and now we have that.
It makes me so sad when my friends post about hating their jobs, losing their jobs, missing their husbands that have to go up north to work for weeks at a time and be away from their families, missing weddings, funerals, special occasions because they cant get time off work and so much more. Yet dont even want to take 30 minutes to listen to something that could change their lives. We used to be those people......the only thing different is that we listened even though we were skeptical. Even though we didnt believe in ourselves. Even though we thought it was just another one of those "things'. There will always be people telling you that you cant do this, that its stupid, that it will never work, but I am here to tell you that it isnt stupid and it DOES work.
I am grateful to Tamara for believing in us when we didnt believe in ourselves, and for caring about us enough to want to share this gift with us because that is truly what it is, a gift. I am grateful for the people that we have met that we never would have if we had said no. I am grateful for my personal growth that I have achieved while in this business, because you see, its not about selling to my friends, its about creating a team of people who have a burning desire for something more and helping them succeed. To watch people I care about achieve success, get off disability, pay off their car, take an extra holiday, or fire their boss, it feels so amazing and inspiring. I have done things I never thought I would ever do, like stand up in front of a crowd (small crowd, but still.... thats huge for me) and share my story, Ive gained more confidence and belief in myself, although that will always be a work in progress... lol And I get to work with the best business partner ever.... my husband!
So i guess I am just sharing this because I am so grateful for this amazing opportunity and for the gifts that it has given me and people that I care about..... Its not meant to solicit you or pressure you to join me because like Tamara told us.... we are running with this no matter what..... It would just be more awesome to do it with the ones i love and care about the most. I cant believe how amazing the past 2 years have been and I cant wait to see what is to come in the next 2 years! And it would be even more amazing to see where your life will be in 2 years from now. Those years are going to pass by anyways.
Why did we decide to join Tamara that day? The fact that she was super excited and bursting at the seams about this opportunity really got me thinking, and it made us excited too, even though we really didnt know much about it yet, and neither did she as she had just started too. She also said that there was no pressure to join her and that she was running with it regardless of our decision.... That was what got me.... I didnt want to be left behind! So even though we didnt really know much yet, we jumped in with 2 feet because we knew if she was excited, there was a reason.Looking back now after 2 years, I really realize the gift that Tamara gave to us. If we had continued to be closed minded and not taken the time simply to listen, our life would look alot different. At the time I had been off work (by choice) for 2.5 years but was having to start to look for work as it was getting tougher to keep up with the bills on only one income as well as running our fitness business. The thought of going back to work after not working for that long, scared the hell out of me. Not to mention it was not something I had any desire to do. Not because i am lazy, because that is not the case. Its because after being home for so long, being able to make my own schedule, being able to attend my daughters school functions and be home for her when she was done school at the end of the day, being able to plan holidays without worrying about if I could have the time off, etc, was something that I enjoyed and was grateful for. Going back to work 40 hours a week would take all that away from me and I would be at the mercy of my boss and having to ask for family time when needed. If i had of not been open minded, I would be doing just that right now.... working a J.O.B and trying to fit in quality family time in on the weekends. Not to mention in this economy, your job isnt even secure anymore like it used to be. Companies are closing down every where we look and who knows what company will be next. If I lost my job, I wouldn't have a 2nd stream of income to fall back on. I would have nothing and that would definitely cause a lot of stress. I also wouldn't have been able to raise our son.... he would have grew up in daycare while I was working to pay for that daycare. Now don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with daycare. My daughter went to daycare since she was 6 months old, however, her daycare teachers got to raise her for the most part while I was at work. That wasnt something we wanted for our son.
Also, at a job, you dont get paid for your efforts. You get told your worth by how much you make an hour. Usually, no matter how hard you work, your pay cheque every 2 weeks is the same. You are trading time for money. I didn't want to do that anymore. We work just hard enough so we dont get fired, and our employer pays us just enough so that we don't quit. I also saw how hard my parents worked their entire lives and for what...... so they could retire with 40% of their income? We didnt want that for ourselves. And my Dad didnt even make it to retirement.... he passed away before he could even enjoy any money from his efforts! Because of losing my first husband when I was only 31, i knew that you arent guaranteed to even be around when its time to retire so then what? All that hard work and your gone. You cant enjoy it with your family and friends because you are no longer here. Today, 2 years later, i havent had to go back to a day job. I work 12-14 hours a week which is full time in Nucerity. I choose when I want to work those 12-14 hours, not a boss. And I get paid for my efforts. If I do nothing, I dont get paid. Its as simple as that. This isnt a get rich quick scheme, its work, just like your job is work. You have to work at it. If you stopped going to work, would you get paid? Nope..... Network marketing is no different. People join thinking its a lottery ticket but its not. Its work! That is why it is called NetWORKing..... they join, talk to a few people, get some no's and quit saying its not for them..... This is a Million $ business and we treat it as such. Its a 2-5 year plan. Heck.... if you could be a millionaire in 2-5 years, wouldnt you want to give it an honest go? Those 2-5 years are going to pass by anyways so why not do something on the side, that you can schedule in when its convenient for you and who knows..... You could fire your boss one day. I know many women and men in this company that have done just that in less than 5 years! We want that for us too and we WILL have it, whether you join us or not.
Now you are probably thinking...... well, I could never do that..... but your wrong. You could! If you believe you can, you can. If you have a burning desire for something more, you will find a way. My burning desire was simply that....... I dont want to work all my life, wishing I could take my family on a vacation, or to grow old with regrets because i worked my whole life trying to earn enough money one day to retire and be with my family. I dont want to stress every month worrying about how I am going to pay the bills and only buying the necessities for groceries because I cant afford to buy the extras.... I wanted more... and now we have that.
It makes me so sad when my friends post about hating their jobs, losing their jobs, missing their husbands that have to go up north to work for weeks at a time and be away from their families, missing weddings, funerals, special occasions because they cant get time off work and so much more. Yet dont even want to take 30 minutes to listen to something that could change their lives. We used to be those people......the only thing different is that we listened even though we were skeptical. Even though we didnt believe in ourselves. Even though we thought it was just another one of those "things'. There will always be people telling you that you cant do this, that its stupid, that it will never work, but I am here to tell you that it isnt stupid and it DOES work.
I am grateful to Tamara for believing in us when we didnt believe in ourselves, and for caring about us enough to want to share this gift with us because that is truly what it is, a gift. I am grateful for the people that we have met that we never would have if we had said no. I am grateful for my personal growth that I have achieved while in this business, because you see, its not about selling to my friends, its about creating a team of people who have a burning desire for something more and helping them succeed. To watch people I care about achieve success, get off disability, pay off their car, take an extra holiday, or fire their boss, it feels so amazing and inspiring. I have done things I never thought I would ever do, like stand up in front of a crowd (small crowd, but still.... thats huge for me) and share my story, Ive gained more confidence and belief in myself, although that will always be a work in progress... lol And I get to work with the best business partner ever.... my husband! So i guess I am just sharing this because I am so grateful for this amazing opportunity and for the gifts that it has given me and people that I care about..... Its not meant to solicit you or pressure you to join me because like Tamara told us.... we are running with this no matter what..... It would just be more awesome to do it with the ones i love and care about the most. I cant believe how amazing the past 2 years have been and I cant wait to see what is to come in the next 2 years! And it would be even more amazing to see where your life will be in 2 years from now. Those years are going to pass by anyways.
Wednesday, 4 February 2015
Widowhood
I cant help but notice so many young couples lately losing their spouses, especially women, and its just so heartbreaking because I know the tough road that they have ahead of them. Every time i hear about someone losing their husband, i relive losing Rene all over again. Its been 12.5 years but its something that will never go away, no matter how long ago it happened, how your life has changed, or if you have remarried. That person was the person who you thought you were going to grow old with, retire with, travel the world with, and suddenly, without any warning, they are ripped away from you like the loss of a limb and you have to change your entire life, the dreams you had are now gone.... or at least you feel they are in that moment. That is the only way to really describe the loss of your spouse is to compare it to losing an arm or a leg. Its something that is a part of you and suddenly its no longer there, and sometimes you forget, like a phantom pain when you are an amputee. Sleep is your only escape and for those few short seconds when you first wake up, you arent thinking about the fact that they are no longer beside you in that bed, and then the harsh reality hits you again like a ton of bricks and you need all the strength you can muster to just swing your legs out of the covers and put your feet on the floor. Getting showered and dressed is your only goal for that day, to make it thru the next few minutes without breaking down and crying.... I am talking ugly girl crying too.... all alone wondering how you will ever be happy again.
People treat you differently.... they don't mean to, they just do. Its not their fault. You are forever changed, you wont ever be the same person before your loss, and that's ok! You will find out who your real, true friends are which can also feel like yet another loss. People forget that after your loss and the funeral, they get to go back to their regular scheduled lives and continue on, but we dont. We get to go back to an empty house that once was a home with our spouse and now its just a constant reminder of what we have now lost, what will never be. We are alone with our thoughts and they arent good..... we are told that if we need anything, to please ask. But we dont know what we want except for to have our loved one back and for everything to be back to the way it was. I was asked that all the time..... what can i do for you....... I had no idea! I had a friend show up one day and just start washing my kitchen floor. I didnt even know that i needed that, but I did!! I felt bad at first but then i saw that this is what she truly wanted to do for me, so i let her.
Please dont say our loved ones are in a better place.... thats not true and its a bit insulting. Being with me was a great place so why is being without me suddenly a better place for them to be?
I would never wish for anyone to go thru the loss of anyone but when i lost Rene, there was no Facebook.... so I didnt know anyone that was going thru what i was going thru except for my 83 year old Nana, but somehow that is different. Yes, she too lost her spouse, but when we are in our 80s and 90s, its more expected. It doesnt make it any less hard, but its an expectation when we are growing old that we will lose our spouse or they will lose us. When we are 31 years old, that is the LAST thing that we expect. Whenever I see a fellow new widow, i am compelled to reach out because I want them to know that there is someone that knows what they are going thru. It sucks!
The first year is the WORST! You have to go thru all those firsts without them. Their Birthday, the first Christmas, Thanksgiving, Valentines Day, Anniversary, kids birthdays if you have kids........ and then the first anniversary of THE day.... Ugh! Its almost as bad as THE actual day. The pain will eventually lessen but we never forget.
Loving again - it can and will happen.... and you might feel guilty about it at first. This is normal. People will tell you their opinions. Happily married people who have never lost a spouse. Some will be happy for you. Some will say you are moving too fast. No one knows the right time except for YOU. Follow your heart. Your loved one would never ever want you to be alone in this world, without love to make you feel safe and happy. I have had people tell me that i was married too soon. For the record, i lost Rene in Sept 2002 and was remarried in August of 2006. 4 years is a long time.... how long am I supposed to be sad and lonely? How long does my daugther have to be without a father figure in her life? Everyone deserves happiness and love. A widow is no different. It doesnt mean they are forgetting their loved one. That is impossible! I still think of Rene alot and I will always love him and we talk about him with my daughter who is now 16 and was 4 when she lost her Dad. She remembers him and still misses him to this day.
So to all those widows out there.... My heart aches for you as I go thru my journey of loss all over again everytime i think of you all. And that is ok because that is a part of me and its made me into the person I am today. I am stronger, more brave, more courageous and i try to live more in the moment as you never know when your last day will be. Listen to your heart, be kind to yourself and take all the time you need to grieve because only YOU know how much time that is.
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People treat you differently.... they don't mean to, they just do. Its not their fault. You are forever changed, you wont ever be the same person before your loss, and that's ok! You will find out who your real, true friends are which can also feel like yet another loss. People forget that after your loss and the funeral, they get to go back to their regular scheduled lives and continue on, but we dont. We get to go back to an empty house that once was a home with our spouse and now its just a constant reminder of what we have now lost, what will never be. We are alone with our thoughts and they arent good..... we are told that if we need anything, to please ask. But we dont know what we want except for to have our loved one back and for everything to be back to the way it was. I was asked that all the time..... what can i do for you....... I had no idea! I had a friend show up one day and just start washing my kitchen floor. I didnt even know that i needed that, but I did!! I felt bad at first but then i saw that this is what she truly wanted to do for me, so i let her.
Please dont say our loved ones are in a better place.... thats not true and its a bit insulting. Being with me was a great place so why is being without me suddenly a better place for them to be?
I would never wish for anyone to go thru the loss of anyone but when i lost Rene, there was no Facebook.... so I didnt know anyone that was going thru what i was going thru except for my 83 year old Nana, but somehow that is different. Yes, she too lost her spouse, but when we are in our 80s and 90s, its more expected. It doesnt make it any less hard, but its an expectation when we are growing old that we will lose our spouse or they will lose us. When we are 31 years old, that is the LAST thing that we expect. Whenever I see a fellow new widow, i am compelled to reach out because I want them to know that there is someone that knows what they are going thru. It sucks!
The first year is the WORST! You have to go thru all those firsts without them. Their Birthday, the first Christmas, Thanksgiving, Valentines Day, Anniversary, kids birthdays if you have kids........ and then the first anniversary of THE day.... Ugh! Its almost as bad as THE actual day. The pain will eventually lessen but we never forget.
Loving again - it can and will happen.... and you might feel guilty about it at first. This is normal. People will tell you their opinions. Happily married people who have never lost a spouse. Some will be happy for you. Some will say you are moving too fast. No one knows the right time except for YOU. Follow your heart. Your loved one would never ever want you to be alone in this world, without love to make you feel safe and happy. I have had people tell me that i was married too soon. For the record, i lost Rene in Sept 2002 and was remarried in August of 2006. 4 years is a long time.... how long am I supposed to be sad and lonely? How long does my daugther have to be without a father figure in her life? Everyone deserves happiness and love. A widow is no different. It doesnt mean they are forgetting their loved one. That is impossible! I still think of Rene alot and I will always love him and we talk about him with my daughter who is now 16 and was 4 when she lost her Dad. She remembers him and still misses him to this day.
So to all those widows out there.... My heart aches for you as I go thru my journey of loss all over again everytime i think of you all. And that is ok because that is a part of me and its made me into the person I am today. I am stronger, more brave, more courageous and i try to live more in the moment as you never know when your last day will be. Listen to your heart, be kind to yourself and take all the time you need to grieve because only YOU know how much time that is.
Wednesday, 21 January 2015
Just Like a Roller Coaster.....
Sometimes I feel like I am on a never ending roller-coaster and i just want to get off of it!!! That would be the roller-coaster of weight loss and learning to love myself as i am NOW.
Eat this, dont eat that, do cardio, dont do cardio, dont eat wheat, eat wheat.... the list goes on and on. I follow the 80-20 rule, everything in moderation, and all that great stuff but my body is just messed up from years of yoyo dieting, diet and fat loss pills, stress, trauma and loss. Even though i feel fine now, trauma has a huge impact on our hormones which definitely effect alot of aspects of our body including weight loss or gain. Sometimes it feels like no matter what i do, my body just doesnt want to cooperate with me and holds onto my weight instead of shedding it. Call it slow metabolism, if you will but i call it a real thorn in my side! It is a frustrating thing and i deal with it everyday of my life, it seems.
There isnt a day that goes by that i don't stress out about what i am going to wear to hide myself and to feel comfortable around others. The stigma that society has about being overweight doesnt help either. Alot of people assume that just because a person is over weight, they are lazy and sit around eating crap food all day long. In most circumstances, that is not the case... although for some that simply is the truth. So when you see someone that is over weight, please dont assume that is why......
This morning i had a short pitty party as i stood on the scale to see how i was doing in my journey.... since the new year, i have cut out wheat (it causes me discomfort and bloating), cut out alcohol for now as all that does is make me feel like crap and depressed the next day, and strips me of my motivation and self esteem,and working out 3-4 times a week..... i lost 7.2lbs as of last week.... today the scale told me i had gained 5 of it back..... (and no, muscle does not weigh more than fat)....I hate my scale... I told it that too...Its mean and im pretty sure it lies! So I had my little cry at 6am, got dressed and went to bootcamp.... Pitty party over... But it still frustrates me and i just want to be thin ... (not skinny) just thinner than I am now and healthy! I want to be proud of myself, love myself and love what i see when i look in that mirror. As women, do we ever like what we see when we look in the mirror? No probably not, but i would like to be at least happy at what i see for once instead of disappointed and embarrassed. Rant over..... back onto the roller-coaster I go........
Eat this, dont eat that, do cardio, dont do cardio, dont eat wheat, eat wheat.... the list goes on and on. I follow the 80-20 rule, everything in moderation, and all that great stuff but my body is just messed up from years of yoyo dieting, diet and fat loss pills, stress, trauma and loss. Even though i feel fine now, trauma has a huge impact on our hormones which definitely effect alot of aspects of our body including weight loss or gain. Sometimes it feels like no matter what i do, my body just doesnt want to cooperate with me and holds onto my weight instead of shedding it. Call it slow metabolism, if you will but i call it a real thorn in my side! It is a frustrating thing and i deal with it everyday of my life, it seems.
There isnt a day that goes by that i don't stress out about what i am going to wear to hide myself and to feel comfortable around others. The stigma that society has about being overweight doesnt help either. Alot of people assume that just because a person is over weight, they are lazy and sit around eating crap food all day long. In most circumstances, that is not the case... although for some that simply is the truth. So when you see someone that is over weight, please dont assume that is why......
This morning i had a short pitty party as i stood on the scale to see how i was doing in my journey.... since the new year, i have cut out wheat (it causes me discomfort and bloating), cut out alcohol for now as all that does is make me feel like crap and depressed the next day, and strips me of my motivation and self esteem,and working out 3-4 times a week..... i lost 7.2lbs as of last week.... today the scale told me i had gained 5 of it back..... (and no, muscle does not weigh more than fat)....I hate my scale... I told it that too...Its mean and im pretty sure it lies! So I had my little cry at 6am, got dressed and went to bootcamp.... Pitty party over... But it still frustrates me and i just want to be thin ... (not skinny) just thinner than I am now and healthy! I want to be proud of myself, love myself and love what i see when i look in that mirror. As women, do we ever like what we see when we look in the mirror? No probably not, but i would like to be at least happy at what i see for once instead of disappointed and embarrassed. Rant over..... back onto the roller-coaster I go........
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